Epiphany in the Gloaming

There's something majestic about being up high with a 360 degree view of an entire city; especially at dusk, when the sky explodes with color and reminds you that you're alive.

If you're someone like me, you yearn for these moments, and when you experience them, you hold on to them for a long time afterwards; sometimes, even for the rest of your life. In times of trouble or emotionally trying times, you might even experience a moment of clarity or some kind of epiphany, if you're lucky enough.

I've had a few epiphanies in my life. One of them occurred around the time I took the photo above. Some time has passed, but today I was reflecting on the moment of clarity I had on that day.

You see...

Most people feel a need to be accepted. We want to feel like we belong, like we fit in; and often we conform to accepted norms in order for that be a reality. The need to fit in is a conditioned survival impulse, and yes, it feels good to be accepted; but when this impulse conflicts with the need to follow your heart, there is really only one choice.

And my epiphany from that day is this: people will inevitably make choices they regret, but following your heart will never be one of them.

Metrosexual Musings

The fact that I actually enjoy this blog adds more fuel to my ever-lingering suspicions that there truly may be something very, very wrong with me.

I say that because it's not like I can really relate to her experiences, and I can't imagine there being very many 38 year-old heterosexual males flocking to the blog to read it, much less being interested in the subject matter and actually liking it.

Apparently, I must be more metrosexual than I realized. I embraced fitting into that description a long time ago, but somehow I always seem surprised when I'm able to confirm this.

I'd say I have plenty of attributes for people to complain about, but fitting into the 'metro' mold isn't one of them. I can fit in and feel completely comfortable in a room full of heterosexual beer-drinking, cheese-eating, football-watching rudimentary buffoons just as easily as I would if I were at a disco ball utopia like the Copacabana, surrounded by eccentric, flamboyantly proud, gay male divas prancing around in purple g-strings and assless chaps.

Wow, talk about digressing.

Anyway, she has a post regarding a visit to NYC that I found quirky and amusing, which is how I'd describe the overall blog so far. I can somehow totally relate to this particular line:

"I could see myself living here and falling madly in love with it, much like I adore Coco [her dog] even though she eats poop."

Feeling Around for a Light Switch

While I was reading a few of my favorite blogs today, it occured to me that I have no idea what I'm doing with mine.

I'm mostly interested in the writing part for this blog, first and foremost, and that's where my sole comfort lies.

When it comes to learning the technical aspects of blogging (i.e. improving the blog), however, I'm completely ignorant.

I know what I'd like this place to look like, but have no idea how to actually make it happen yet.

I feel like a 2 year-old trying to learn violin for the first time; which isn't the bad part. The bad part is that I'm like a 2 year-old who wants to play Vivaldi in his first week of learning.

Needless to say, that clearly isn't going to happen!

At least it appears that no one is able to find this blog via any search engines yet, so I suppose there's plenty of time to work on making it 'purty.'

In the meantime, I hope what I do have up so far is at least mildly interesting. While I clumsily search for a light switch in a pitch-black room, you might also want to check out the blogs I'm following. They're all quite interesting, in my opinion.

Speaking of 2 year-olds, this is me when I was about that age. While much has changed since then, clearly, some things haven't. ;o)

Day One

Hi.

My real name isn't Will.

Sometimes I wish it was though.

I don't know what exactly I intend to write about in the is blog. I just know that I can't seem to find anyone else out there who writes about things I feel like I need to read about.

All I know is that I'm lost. I'm lost and I wouldn't mind finding my way home, back to me.

I want more. I just don't really know what more is.

I have so much to say, but I have no one to say it to.

And I feel quite damaged as of today. Emotionally speaking.

So, this is me trying to make sense of my life...of the world around me.

Feel free to be a part of the ride. As long as you're respectful to me and anyone else who may leave comments, I'll be happy to hear your thoughts or make your acquaintance.

Welcome.